Confession: I'm Horny

At the risk of sounding like a whore, I used to have a very uh hem healthy sex drive. For the past few years, it has practically been nonexistent. I couldn't figure out what happened exactly, but it was not exactly fun. I've been with the same man for nearly four years now--married nearly two. So, you can understand how a normal sex drive could be beneficial. I tried several things, but nothing seemed to change the situation. However, since I started the Metformin for my PCOS, I have just been downright teenager horny. I want it at least once nearly every day. I don't have any proof it's the treatment for the PCOS, but it makes sense. I mean, if there is a hormonal imbalance due to the PCOS, it certainly makes sense that fixing it could have those kinds of effects. So, while I have little to no evidence and no other cases to cite to the effect, I'm gonna say, "Thank you, Metformin, for giving me back my sex life!"

Confession: I Do Drugs (Legally)

Well, it's been quite some time since I've graced you with actual blogging. As I was driving home today in my husband's truck, "Big Red" (see below), which I am more than certain is short for Big Redneck Truck (since I call it that), I was just thinking. And, you know what I was thinking? I was just thinking, I'm happy. I'm happy even though I'm about to be at the end of my temporary position and have no idea if I'll get my unemployment back. I'm happy even though I am living in my in-laws' basement. I'm happy even though I'm completely exhausted. I'll be honest with you, it's probably the Paxil my doctor gave me a few weeks ago when I was a basket case. He also gave me Xanax "for when it's really bad". LOL The Ambien he gave me didn't last long. I was hallucinating. Not fun. Especially if you are not doing it for recreational purposes!

Big Red(neck Truck)

But, maybe, just maybe, in a more simple and forgiving world, I'm happy because I have a new dishwasher (with no electrical hookup for it and no cabinet to put it in).

Maybe it's because I have a new stove with glass top and self cleaning oven (with no electrical hookup for it).

Maybe it's because I have a new counter and cabinets with a new (redneck rigged) sink and faucet.

Maybe it's because I have a new counter top (just sitting over beside the minute amount of usable counter space).

Maybe it's because I have a new (ghetto) bathroom with a new (secondhand) counter and sink (which is an honestly huge improvement over the blue sink that was there--see below), shelving rack (because there are no cabinets), new shower (with plastic walls on a metal tub with chips in the PINK paint).

Maybe it's because I have a new curtain that cinches up all cutesy wootsey (and completely impossible to make like the picture) because there are no curtains available in the range of 25" to 35" to fit above the new air conditioner (which we have because we have no air down here, and it wouldn't matter anyway because my father-in-law controls the temperature, and he is always freezing, and I'm burning up to death like I'm in the pits of hell with a hot poker shoved up my ass sideways).

Or, maybe it's because of my super cactus (which now has this fungus-looking shit on it, and I think it's going to die).

Nah, it's probably the Paxil. Oh, drugs. They do make life grand!

KIDS! Don't do drugs!

Confession: I had a Nervous Breakdown in Public

I alluded to this previously. I thought it deserved a blog post.

I had to go to the unemployment office to reapply for unemployment when my severance ran out. Why they can't just do that if you are certifying I don't know. So, I have to get up at the ass crack, go stand in line for an hour, deal with fucking morons who can't figure out which end to shit out of, and get a different answer from every person I talk to. It's a blast.

So, I do my time in line, and they check me in. And, they tell me to go sit down and wait for my name to be called. Um, didn't I just wait in line? Whatever. So, I sit and wait for my name to be called. I go up, and I tell her my severance has ran out, and she reopens my claim. Then, she says I need to meet with a reemployment representative, and she says to sit down and they will call my name. So, I sit, and I wait, and no one calls my name. After 30 more minutes, I go up and ask what the hold up is, you know, besides their complete idiocy.

She tells me I was supposed to go into the reemployment workshop that start an hour ago that is two hours long that will not begin again for another hour. So, I'm like, um, no. So, she gets someone from that department to meet with me one on one. And, he says I wasn't even supposed to meet with him. I just needed to reopen my claim, and I could go.

Awesome. Two hours of my life I'll never get back.

But it gets better.

I ask what will happen if I miss these stupid little workshops if I am working full time. And, he's like, if you're working full time, you don't get unemployment. And, I'm like, what the fuck?

And, I. Lose. It.

Because I will not even be making as much as my unemployment benefit while teaching (and the unemployment benefit is a third of what I made before).

I fucking lost it.

In public.

Like breakdown. In tears.

Dude did not know what to do.

Poor guy.

So, he gets a claims person to come over, and she confirms what I thought before (he was wrong), and I run like hell.

I was already supposed to be at school observing any way, and I was worried about being so late.

I know, it was stupid, but I was in there, I was shaking, I was nervous, I was red faced and my blood pressure was spiking, I was sick to my stomach, and I was just all around not feeling well. The stress was just getting to me. And, when he told me I was basically fucked, I just couldn't handle it all. I guess that makes me a weak person, but I am about two seconds from going to get some anxiety drugs. I have always been high strung, but this is unreal. For anyone who has ever experienced a panic attack, a nervous breakdown, or any other mental issue, it is a real and true medical problem. You are not alone. There is nothing wrong with you. I just wanted to get that public service announcement out.

Thanks.

Confession: Semi-Good News

I have an interview today for a supply teacher (long-term substitute) position at a local high school teaching Physical Science. I am probably going to be super depressed when I don't get this position because a) I need good news, b) I need a reason to get up and get dressed everyday, and c) I'm the biggest math and science nerd EVER, and I happen to love the material taught in this class.

The position is temporary, immediately to April 13th, so it isn't very long. However, the Assistant Principal said there is a possibility of it extending to the end of the school year.

I really want this, so please wish me luck and say a prayer for me, if you do that sort of thing. Thanks.

Confession: I Hate Dogmar Midcrap

Dagmar Midcap aka Dogmar Midcrap is the stupid bitch of a weather girl on the local CBS affiliate. And, I hate her. She's a complete idiot. We are having a massive amount of tornadoes in Georgia right now. This moron called Monticello "montechello--like the instrument. I mean, really. You work in Georgia. Learn how to say the names of the God damned cities. I can't help it you're a Canadian. It's not Dackula. It's not like Dracula. It's Daquela. It's not Winder, like the southern folk call windows. It is Winder, as it wind it up. OMG!

I Have a Confession to Make: I Swear I Didn't Know

My name is Linz, and I like the Rolling Stones and the Beatles.

I know.

Travis dumped all of his songs to my PC last night so I could steal all the ones I like. And, I was going through them, and I got to a bunch of Rolling Stones songs, and I recognized them. And, I liked them. OMG. Then, I got to a bunch of Beatles songs, and I recognized those. And, I liked them, too! I don't know what's going on. I've loved these songs my entire life thanks to my dad (who may or may not be that generation, since he is only 47, but he listened to all this stuff when I was growing up), and I never knew that was who sang them.

Oh, well. I hope that doesn't make me too much of a hippie to blast Obama on a daily basis. It doesn't make me a hippie, does it? Right? Right?! Damn.