You've Got to be Kidding: "Friendly" Reminder

So, Mommmaaaa and I were talking last night, and it seems that there is a mysterious organization that is sending out these "friendly" little reminders about not being a redneck piece of white trash (or any other colored trash for that matter) in Athens-Clarke County, Georgia. I had her scan and send me the "reminder". (Click for larger.)

Apparently, you can't park on the grass IN YOUR OWN YARD. What the hell is this? You can only park vehicles on "improved" surfaces, i.e., driveways, walkways (hey, it's "improved"), graveled areas, etc., anything but grass, really. I'm a little perturbed by this. I mean, it's my frickin' yard. I'm not parking up on the curb. I'm parking in MY yard. And, you can come in here and tell me how to park in my own yard? That I paid for? That I pay property taxes on? This, somehow, just doesn't seem right to me.

I can understand the problems with littler/trash/debris being in your yard. That's just trashy. Excuse my pun. But, even that sort of irks me. I mean, if some asshole comes to my house and throws his McDonald's bag in my yard, I'm supposed to pick the shit up? How about no? Convicts need work. So sorry.

The part about accumulation of refuse I can get. Not really a problem there.

The part about the "solid waste roll carts" burns me up, too, though. I mean, what if I'm out of town on trash day, so I put it out there the day before? Say I'm out of town the day after trash day, too. Oops, I just fucked up. Here come the "Pretty Police" from the "Community Protection Division" to write me a citation. For leaving my trashcan at the curb for more than 24 hours. Awesome.

Don't you have something better to do with your worthless waste of a life than bother me? I pay my taxes. I pay your salary. Why do you have to mess with me?! I mean, really, the "Community Protection Division"? Shouldn't you be making sure that sex offending pervert isn't moving next door to six-year-old Johnny? Or making sure the gang bangers aren't harassing some kid or raping some girl? "Community protection" my ass. All they are protecting is the city's checkbook. Yeah, I said it. This is a get money quick scheme the city conjured up because they are flat ass broke. Yeah. Flat. Ass. Broke. As in, they are in debt up to their eyeballs, and they can't find any way to cut their enormous budget. So, they have to go to law abiding citizens and harass them out of fees and fines for parking on their own property and leaving their trash can at the curb for more than five minutes and not picking up after littering shitheads when the convicts need work to do anyway.

I think it's funny, though, that they didn't even get the vehicle correct. It's not a Ford Ranger Crew Cab. It's an Explorer Sport Trac. And, it says so in plain English in, like, three places on the truck.